AUNTY RORY’S LOVE CHRONICLE: SO YOU THINK YOU ARE IN LOVE

Your heart is beating at an overly accelerated rate, you can’t breathe, you think you are hyperventilating, and you are always on the edge of your seat. Footsteps approaching, quickened breathing, sweat build-up on your forehead. Oh my God, they are near…

Aunty, wake up. You are watching a horror show or are you? x.

So you wake up first thing in the morning and that gorgeous face creeps into your head. You have been talking nonstop about this guy/girl and even me sef I am tired of hearing their names. It is Gorgeous Guy this, Gorgeous Girl that. I know I am rolling my eyes at you but na beef from my side.

You want to look and be caught stunning when this person walks into the room. I can’t even get free time with you anymore I need appointment. You have changed and it’s not only me that has noticed your other aproko/amebo/nosy friends have noticed as well. You that I would beg for days to forgive me for fibbing on you now your forgiveness is like running water. Hmmm. I am happy for you oh.

Anyway back to the matter at hand, you don’t know what is wrong with you, you feel like dragging this person to meet your family, you want to eat this person up (literally go Hannibal on their ass) because you cannot stand being away from them for 5 seconds, you wish the both of you are Siamese twins so that you can go everywhere together. Invasive but I kind of understand where you are going with this. Anything this your person tells you is gold even when I Rory, told you not to eat that last piece of meat because I had my eye on it but because lover person told you to, you ate my meat without blinking as it is your entitlement, you were eating and smiling into his face…. Hiss. Everything they say is the truth, who told you and how do you know?

I told you they had knock-knees, you said No, you don’t care about their flaws, to you that’s what makes them special and yours. Are you still asking me what is wrong with you? I think you fell on your head and must have had a concussion. Uncle that is dark like midnight, the other day standing by his car, we could not identify which one was the car door or his shirt, you say he is dark and handsome. Aunty that spots have covered the whole of her face, we know that it is from acne, you say she is freckled… Ok Oh! Who am I to talk? What do I know? The other day we saw that actor that is smoking hot and they were giving us the “I want you look”, you did not notice and kept on talking about God knows what. To tell you the truth I wasn’t listening to your ramblings. My eyes were on Mr. Smoking Hot. You tell me how he annoys you; you feel like killing him but just thinking about it makes you laugh.

You are still asking me what is wrong with you? Please wake up… Anyway, I am using you as my side project… Keep your forgiving self because we are about to blow this up.

Love Rorangnane.

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