Hmmm, if you guys don’t know, there are certain things I, Rorangnane, does not like. One of these things is a Toxic Friendship. That Aunty or Uncle that is always draining you, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.
Ahh, Aunty, it is OK. We go to a party, the guys are not staring your way, it is not the end of the world. You don’t have to spoil it for me. There are days too, that I can look like Beyoncé, it’s not only you.
I want to feel comfortable and say I like watching cute cat videos and the boy at the bakery store with no money. I want to wear miniskirts because I have never tried them on and I think they would look nice on me too. I don’t like Louboutin and prefer my hair in a ponytail. What is it? I want to be free.
I dodge toxic people like Neo dodges bullets in the Matrix; Interacting with them is too much stress.
Here are 4 signs to know if you have a toxic friend, seriously try it out.
- Negative Energy: when you are hanging out with this friend of yours, he/she drains you. You feel so tired spending time with them. It is like a chore and you can’t wait for the date/meetup to be over. I know that most times, we find it hard to end relationships/friendships that are not working anymore but please I beg you, it is not worth it. Delete their number mistakenly, ghost toxic friends, your health will improve because of this.
- They blame you for everything. Even when you are not physically involved in the scenario, it is your fault oh. It is your fault that they lost that job, it is your fault that the guy didn’t come up to talk to them. If only you would wear those heels, your legs would look straighter then everyone won’t think we are not posh. To be frank with you, you are not their downfall and if you keep getting blamed for everything, it is time to hit the road, Jack/Jill.
- Passive-Aggressiveness, this behaviour is an indirect or devious way of expressing hostility. You know that friend that likes to keep malice when they know that they are the ones that hurt you first but they always do that to get the upper hand in the disagreement. They don’t need to tell you that they are upset by shouting, but will give you a look that you know that ahhh, this will entail begging for a week. I know that some of us are passive-aggressive and we don’t know it. Issok, it is not your fault. Instead of saying that you are upset, you find petty ways to upset your friend/family. These types of people need total ignoring. Pay them no attention.
- They are always jealous of you and every other person. Whenever you have a happy piece of news that you are about to share, they always have something better to say or try to bring down your own piece of news, stating that yours is irrelevant. They are jealous of your other friends and would not want them around you. They always want you to see the bad in others.
So these are my signs ohhh, I smell them out like buns in the oven. Once they are in my sight, I dodge. Life is too short to surround yourself with people who are not worth it.
- For the negative energy friends, put on your big boy/girl pants and tell them you guys need some time out. State that every meeting you have is a chore as the person only always focuses on the negatives. Sometimes talking may actually help them understand what you are going through.
- Blaming, let them understand that there is no way you can be blamed for every disappointment they go through in life and that they should get their facts right. People like this use subtle bullying, push back and make them understand that you are no longer going to sit idly and accept whatever is thrown your way.
- The Passive-Aggressive friends require ignoring, but before that make them understand that you know that they are upset but being PA is not the best way forward, after that ignore them to thy kingdom come.
- Jealous friends need a booting. Booting out of your life because whatever you do will not be good in their eyes. Run with the heels of your feet hitting the back of your butt. Put a wide gulf between you and them because jealous friends are harmful.
Think about your health…… Toxic Friends are a no no. Aunty Bye.